PROJECTION – Hocus Pocus or Narcissistic Magic! The real person behind that mask is all a concoction the Narcissist creates which changes with the wind as they morph into their many personalities AS NEEDED! There is nobody really there!

PROJECTION – Hocus Pocus or Narcissistic Magic! The real person behind that mask is all a concoction the Narcissist creates which changes with the wind as they morph into their many personalities AS NEEDED! There is nobody really there!

Projection is a Narcissist’s trademark! It is a hard concept to put into perspective as in totally wrapping your head around WHAT it is and WHY the Narcissist does this, but it will explain away a good portion of the many crazy and awful things that they have accused you of as well as said to you that only confused you more. We must understand what is behind this projection as it concerns the Narcissist and how they transfer their faulty identity through dumping their shame onto and into us as well as reflecting their image of goodness off of us for their own viewing pleasure. It seems so complex, but you can and will make sense of it once you get a basic understanding of the process.

From my Book: Greg Zaffuto – Author – from Charm to Harm and Everything Else in Between with a Narcissist

 So, to start, think of “projection” as the Narcissist posing in the image of your face just as if they were looking in a mirror for a reflection of themselves. They are projecting or throwing all the bad flaws, deeds, and ALL of the beliefs about themselves onto and INTO you. These feelings or beliefs are the positive ones as well as the negative ones. The positive projection is linked directly to their ‘love bombing that got you trapped in their world and started you off on this dehumanizing journey. In their grand creation of their false self, they try to encapsulate every AMAZING quality they can into their mask that HIDES their true damaged self that they project to everyone that makes them so CHARMING! Along the same lines they will have to dump most if not all of the reality of their damaged and perverted self onto somebody as well when they need to. When I say somebody that means other human beings again because they are posing and using us like a mirror.

 Think of it in your own normal and functioning world as to why you would ever lie. Well first off because you would be hiding some sort of ugly action and trying to redeem yourself, so you won’t be cast off and out of your circle of friends, family and loved ones. Lying is the use of words to project a false image to correct the real or bad image! You could also lie in a good way by over complimenting or flattering someone to win them over, perhaps even exaggerate a few things here and there, but basically lying has a deceptive agenda attached to it. With the Narcissist think of it in bigger terms or EVERYTHING that constitutes their personality or life is based on lies and hideous distortions and it is pathological in nature and all consuming. You or I could never have known this when we met them, nor could we have done anything to correct any of their dysfunction. This is their normal and they just utilize their talents to jump from one relationship to another and they are not looking back at any of the damage they have caused to anybody.

More about PROJECTION? Imagine watching a movie on the big screen at a theater. To make the movie viable and ALIVE so that people can see the writer’s and director’s creation, it has to be PROJECTED onto a screen, otherwise it is just a canister of film that has no meaning. Basically, the Narcissist is an empty vessel that lacks reality, emotions, and empathy, so like a writer/director they must create a fictional story to be endearing, open, welcoming and charming to survive and live alongside all of us in the world. Then they must project it onto and into their audience. Just like the writer/director the Narcissist reflects in the glory of their work on our faces! The movie is fictional to say the least and just one big gross lie but they make it as perfect as they can so they can profit from it.

 This is how they justify the HUGE denial of their disordered life. If they are creating these amazing qualities to hide behind, they are obviously cognizant or aware of just how damaged they are to HAVE to hide them. They can’t hold onto that awareness of being damaged and destructive, so THIS IS WHY they are projecting an altered and amazing persona. Just part of the process to create their false world as well as dragging us into it to see their own reflection through us! This process holds them together, so the truth doesn’t make their head implode. BUT always remember there is absolutely NOTHING real about them – let me repeat this again – NOTHING IS REAL ABOUT THEM!! They absolutely know this so when that damaged child starts surfacing after they have betrayed us, cheated, lied, stole or any number of things they need to dump those feelings of inadequacy and guilt ASAP – they HAVE to patch up that mask or false image to save themselves from seeing their REAL image or reflection? So, they just dump it onto and into somebody else and that would be our role in all of this. We are the mirror or big screen, and they are a self-contained fortress full of fake images to adorn themselves with as well as establish and enable some sort of reality to hide all of their damaged parts!

What is the main coefficient here? You, me, and the rest of the world. Without us there is no way they can participate in life and achieve supply. They MUST live amongst us with a believable reality, but they can’t monitor or control their distorted needs, nor do they even see their destructiveness or perverted lifestyle as dysfunctional because they are too damaged and just don’t care. Everything you offer them be it care, or unconditional love is used and abused so they can get what they want period. Their ‘projection’ is the tool they use to HIDE the truth and make us believe. Unfortunately, that façade and mask slips because they obviously will get caught up in their lies and distortion, so they turn them right back around onto and into us as if we are abusive like them! They are very efficient abusers as it concerns hiding their reality to get what they want. We have to put ourselves in a position to truly understand that what they were doing was subjugation to each and every one of us and only destructive to US. No there is no real love or commitment as it concerns our time with them and there never will be. Once you get to this realization the pieces fall in place to help you actualize your position as an object that they only extorted and abused you!

 As simple as it all sounds the Narcissist’s aim is impeccable and all of us are the targets and we make their life work. Think about their attacks. Who does the Narcissist call a liar? The honest person and usually that means you and me, but who is the real liar – the Narcissist? Who does The Narcissists say is bad, dangerous and the abusive person? Well again the good person that actually cares for them and probably loves them and that is us again. They will put themselves before their own biological children and family, and that speaks so loudly about how disordered they really are! Remember though they are quite talented at what they do, and they have all of this down to an art form so their talent for farce is so great that MANY people mistake the Narcissist for stoic and astute as we have all done. They are working that image for sure and hanging onto that mask for dear life. But in that definition just remember that their insecurity is so intense that they have to seek out many mirrors (people) to constantly reinforce the big facade or the big lie of what and who they are. They have no room for anything else in their lives other than keeping that façade and themselves viable and alive – but it is not plausible because they are so out of control that they always get caught up in their own game. You can only fake it for so long! Greg

Posted on May 31, 2022, in Narcissism. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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