The Narcissist BASICALLY imitates that they care about you or even love you as long as he/she continues to see you reflect extreme adulation and admiration for them, which is usually in the beginning of your personal relationship with them – but ANY time spent with them will result in the victim’s total devaluation because EVRYONE has an expiration date with a Narcissist.

From my Book – From Charm to Harm and Everything else in Between with a Narcissist! @http://www.amazon.com

 

So how could you have been such a fool? The painful realization often comes with the disbelief of just how could we have not realized that he/she was like this? That’s another thing that educating yourself about this disorder will teach you very clearly and that is the Narcissistic personality is especially good at being pathologically deceptive and manipulative, at simulating genuine affection and caring to gain our trust so they can essentially manage us down to control us and abuse us. In reality, the Narcissist is only capable of caring about themselves. The Narcissist can BASICALLY imitate that they care about you or even love you as long as he/she continues to see you reflect extreme adulation and admiration for them, which is usually in the beginning of your personal relationship with them – but ANY time spent with them will result in the victim’s total devaluation. Underneath all of that is a delusional and out-of-control amoral person that lacks respect for life and people and has no conscience about how they debase people to GET WHAT THEY WANT and that is supply. That is what it all boils down to, we satisfy some sort of need and they have many needs, and many people they use to satisfy that immense needy void – so when we are no longer a viable source of supply they just move on to the next and annihilate us because WE REFLECTED THE TRUTH OF WHAT THEY ARE!

 

The perceptions of the Narcissist are truly their reality. If you look back you have never been able to change or influence their perceptions because they got louder and completely ignored your every word to the contrary concerning any of their delusional outbursts, especially if it concerned their own accountability. If you couldn’t effect change living in a close relationship with them, then don’t waste your time and effort ever trying AGAIN because nobody will EVER be a real person to Narcissist because the Narcissist does not allow individuality in people – we are basically there to serve their needs and that is all. They live in their own world and no matter how false or unreal it appears to you, for them it is reality because it has to be for them to survive among us. As soon as a Narcissist begins to perceive that you have a voice of your own and a right to existence, the trouble starts and then there is no return because there is no possibility of two-way communication with them and the more you push your individualism forward the more resistance from the Narcissist. Their façade is impenetrable and has to be or they would self-destruct if people knew the truth of how disordered and destructive they are.

 

Lies and deceit are as natural to the Narcissist’s world as is breathing. A Narcissist has the amazing ability with their ‘shrewd deception’ to make ‘others’ believe their lies EVEN when they fly right in the face of overwhelming evidence to the contrary. Heck they are so smooth at their LIES that the Narcissist also believes THEIR own lies. Mine could have been given an honorary PHD in lies, and lying! Take the position that everything they say to you is a lie and or based on a lie OR as my friend once told me “if they are breathing they are lying!”

 

It is extremely painful, to come to the conclusion that people who have meant a great deal in your personal (or professional) life can ACTUALLY destroy you and you have to disengage with them to literally save your life. It is EXTREMELY painful, but the alternative is only to continue the descent along the dark path of self-destruction. Stop it all and finally break the chain that keeps you tied to an abuser. Everything you have built with this person was done in vain, and if you keep believing or buying into the games/lies with the hope to catch a glimpse of what things were like when you lived in the illusion they fabricated for you, you will only be drawn back into the abuse over and over again and it will get worse. The promises, like a lifelong journey together or sharing the joys of REAL love, a future, intellectual fulfillment, dreams, goals, etc., were part of the abuse to only control you and keep you chained to the abuse.

 

Unfortunately, you have to learn and accept that the psychological and emotional investment you made in a Narcissist is/was valueless, and you have to write them off completely as a bad debt. If you continue any type of association with them, you will only lose your soul and hand it over to a deceitful, perverted and loathsome character that will use and drain the life right out of you – just like the “un-dead” fictional characters that are looking to feed off of the life force of other human beings to BECOME alive again. It is just incomprehensible that they have the cognitive ability to plan and scheme as they do to trap us, debilitate their target, know it is wrong, lie about their actions to cover up their tracks, destroy our good name, extort everything they can, and run off as they do to another unsuspecting target. Sounds more like a well-planned out process to me.

 

One day you will see the complete picture and it will never make what they did better, but you will understand because you have finally been educated into what they are and what YOU aren’t. A Narcissist is a dead giveaway in the way they create their delusional turmoil after each and every departure from one of their con jobs or relationships as the Narcissist prefers to call them. While they are running away like the thieves they really are with their tails between their legs, they are really running away from the truth of who and what they are. We are the truth they are running from as they are throwing lies at us in an effort to smear our integrity and destroy us. They never can or will admit to what they have done, instead they will always slither into someone else’s life to find shelter, and take what they can emotionally and physically. The truth here my friends is that YOU were too strong for this Narcissist and they saw the truth of what they are reflected through you! No/minimal contact to start the journey to recovery! Greg

Posted on March 24, 2017, in Narcissism. Bookmark the permalink. 4 Comments.

  1. Such a great, precise article on narcissists!
    The first indication that I knew something was wrong with him, was 24 years ago, just after we got married. I can’t remember what set him off. He was about to cook outside on the grill with charcoal. Walking from the garage, through the house to the back door, he THREW the full bag of charcoal up against the light beige painted wall, black charcoal dust blew all over everything, the bag popped open. A toddler acts like that!
    Two years later our son was born. He was so happy. Two years after that, he became jealous of the time I spent being the mother to our son. He started gambling, doing drugs, wore me down with verbal, emotional, pressure abuse, stealing our money, spending every penny I had in savings, including most of my IRA account. Such a MANIPULATOR, DECEIVER!
    His incarcerations in the city and county jail were a long 8 year process.
    I quickly noticed his coldness in the first year of marriage. His touch feels cold and mechanical, like there’s NO warm red blood inside him. It’s an errie feeling.
    I’ve asked him countless times, “Who are you? It’s like there’s no one inside your body.” He looks at me with cold, black, blank staring eyes, and says nothing!
    There have been countless other RAGING episodes over 24 years. I could write a book.
    For years I thought he needed anger management classes.
    This past January 2017, he displayed the most VOLCANIC DEMONIC MANIAC RAGING ANGER episode! It was like HELL opened up a hole in the bedroom floor and the most DARK VILE EVIL DEMONIC ENERGY burst out from his whole body, like a RAGING MONSTER! He looked like the HULK, except his skin was blood red, not green. It hit me with such a tremendous force, I almost fell down. I couldn’t move, I was paralyzed until he stopped spewing all his vile anger rage all over me. I have no idea what words he was RAGING! It took me 7 days to recover, I had no energy left, he sucked all the life energy out of my body! I’ve never experienced anything so utterly horrible.
    After 24 years I NOW KNOW WHAT HE, (IT), IS!!!
    He seems to be only interested in CONTROL and MONEY! With a court order, i got him out of the house in 2004, but HE KEEPS COMING BACK!
    In my situation, at the moment, I can’t support myself financially.
    The drugs, his high fat diet, and no exercise, have taken a toll on his health, he has multiple serious health problems. I do not see any evidence of him ever leaving.

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  2. The last paragraph is so true thank you for the help I still need x

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  3. I don’t understand why you say the EVERYONE has an expiration date to the Narcissist. Why is that? Do they know that going in? I suspect they do due to their nature and pattern. They know themselves that much, they know what motivates them. They even know they are imitating other humans to feign love and caring when they feel virtually nothing.

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