THE ONLY TRUTH – What it ALL comes down to is that we ALL had a specific PURPOSE that the Narcissist had in mind, AND an expiration date once that was achieved AND they found our replacement supply.
THE ONLY TRUTH – What it ALL comes down to is that we ALL had a specific PURPOSE that the Narcissist had in mind, AND an expiration date once that was achieved AND they found our replacement supply. There is NEVER a person that a Narcissists likes, cares for, or ever loves – it was just our turn to be their latest source of supply or their latest fix because they have NO EMPATHY WHATSOEVER!
From my Book: Greg Zaffuto – Author – From Charm to Harm and Everything Else in Between with a Narcissist
What it all comes down to – THE DISCARD – after the Narcissist has gotten everything he/she wanted from you and has probably secured other new targets for supply, they move on without a care. We were ONLY a COMPONENT in what was an agenda of a disordered Narcissist seeking out to extort supply from us and anybody else. This is just day to day business with a Narcissist seeking out or better yet extorting people and life. People are expendable and interchangeable to them BUT people are a resource the Narcissist NEEDS to survive, and we are replaced quite readily.
For any victim/target, this process is excruciatingly personal. It may have cost you so much time, your heart, your friends, your family, your self-esteem, your career, or your finances. You may have put everything you had and given everything you could to this relationship. It may have become your entire life, even having a family with a Narcissist. For the Narcissist however, the whole process is not really personal AT ALL! The Narcissist WILL do the same thing to just about anyone who allowed him/her into their intimate life. We are all reduced to and considered OBJECTS and possible supply – and life is a department store where the Narcissist shops for the SPECIFIC supply they desire – but they would be more aptly described as “shoplifters” because they feel completely entitled to take whatever they desire AND when they desire it!
They will do it again and again to everyone they seduce into their lair of manipulation, lies, and betrayal. It’s not about you or me, and it is not about the other people involved who are new/extra supply, the many partners they were with sexually, the minions the Narcissist employ in their game and set against you, or the many ‘others” the Narcissist used to make you compete and/or jealous – all of this is supply to validate Narcissist’s ego, to give him/her pleasure, to meet his/her fickle needs. There is no person or supply that means anything more or less than any other supply.
The Narcissist was not with them (the new/extra supply) because they are/were superior to you. The Narcissist was with them for the same reason that he/she was with you or me – to extort and use them, perhaps for different purposes than the Narcissist used you, but with the same devastating effect – abuse. The Narcissist will invariably treat others in a very similar way to how he/she treated you. Idealize, devalue and discard is the Narcissist utilizing and processing its target/victim into what we believe is a ‘relationship’ to secure or harvest supply – then move on to the next. It was/ is and will always be only about the Narcissist’s need to extort people and life. Our abuse is the outcome of the process (idealize, devalue and discard). They win us over with their pathological seduction to control us and USE US to satisfy all their needs for as long as you stay with the Narcissist. WE ARE ALL SUPPLY AND TEMPORARY.
SO, THE WHY as it concerns the great CHARM production and then the discard – simply because he/she has gotten everything they wanted out of you. Taking away your dignity, happiness, spirit, and your life demand by demand, concession by concession, negative word by negative word and every perverted action to betray every aspect of your goodness even destroying your self-esteem by demeaning, debasing, and making fun of you. As it turns out, the reward you get for all your care, friendship, devotion, efforts, and love — is nearly being destroyed by a psychopath/narcissist. You were manipulated and even brain-washed to ignore your own needs and to only fulfill the Narcissist’s every need and to gain their approval back repeatedly. ALL OF THIS after tricking you into believing they were real and there was substance behind their words and actions when there were NONE! The Narcissist has transformed you into a mere shadow of the awesome, good, warm, wonderful, lively, confident human being you once were.
Nothing was ever real – those four words sum it up completely. This is/was abuse, and the target/victim is left vulnerable to sort all this abuse out with more loss to come with the secret smear campaign that awaits them. There may be children involved, financial ruin, and even homelessness. So, what is just so hard to believe for the naysayers that must doubt that this abuse is worthy of recognition and just respond with “move on?” Or the minions that are just that weak that they hang on to every word/lie a Narcissist speaks and follows them into battle to help destroy a target/victim? The Narcissist is just that seductive and intuitive enough to brainwash so many people into believing their con. These are abusive predators and extortionist, and they are destructive. You can run from these creatures, but you better run as fast as you can because they will run you over and drag you back every opportunity you give them. NO CONTACT and boundaries that are impenetrable. Always remember this is THEIR circus, their monkeys, and their KARMA – none of this was YOUR fault or had to do with anything YOU are or did to them! It all starts with no/minimal contact to end this chaos and abuse so you can (and will) move onto a healthy and good life. Greg