A little bit more to take with you today!
In the end you will realize that there was absolutely nothing you gained from your relationship with a Narcissist except getting your freedom back to live a normal and healthy life again. Your empathy and emotions connected you to them at the hip – we call this “love” in a normal relationship, but unfortunately there was not even an ounce or shred of normalcy/reality in our association with them. It was a master of deception extorting every aspect of our life mentally and physically.
From my Book: Greg Zaffuto – Author – From Charm to Harm and Everything Else in Between with a Narcissist
There are situations where you MUST deal with a Narcissist – especially if you have children together, or they are a family member. So, to cope with a Narcissist effectively you must be able to differentiate between reality and normalcy that is YOU AND YOUR REAL LIFE as compared to the constant drama, chaos and crazy making that orbits around the Narcissist constantly. You must consistently validate your own personal existence and morals, and hold on to yourself with a firm grip, never allowing the narcissist to drag you back into the abuse by violating and controlling your emotions, thoughts, or behaviors like they did. If you don’t, they will eat you alive and drag you back into the abuse with their vast array of manipulation, lies, betrayal, brainwashing and essentially psychological ABUSE!
Those flying monkeys/minions or the people that need chaos, lies, belittling, chaos, crazy making, etc., are there with the monster where they belong, so do not allow them ANY space in your head and discard them with the abuser. There is NO beautiful life that surrounds a Narcissist, only lies, illusions, delusions, and chaos – all at the cost of the ‘others’ around the Narcissist (even those minions and flying monkeys). BE VERY THANKFUL that you are away from the abuse and learn about who you are again, because you are an amazing person that can and will survive this psychological terrorism or attack from this monster. Stay NO CONTACT/minimal contact at all costs and feel the freedom and love you deserve. You will get there with positive solutions, knowledge, education, and support – you are NOW a survivor and will thrive! Greg