Their words are as EMPTY as they are! We must always understand that their words are useless and blah, blah, blah!
Their words are as EMPTY as they are! We must always understand that their words are useless and blah, blah, blah! That includes the CHARMING words they use to lure us into their world as well as their HARMING words that are used to diminish us and make us feel worthless and wrong! It is always about the manipulation, the ‘con,’ and their game to get what they want – and that includes DESTROYING people that stand in their way – and we all end up there!
From my Book: Greg Zaffuto – Author – From Charm to Harm and Everything Else in Between with a Narcissist
ANY type of relationship with a Narcissist will leave a person doubting their own sanity. The target/victim, and there is always a target/ victim, is left in total shock, with their jaw dropping to the floor, shaking their head and wondering, “What has happened?”
A Narcissist creatively figures out some unique and impressive angle quickly, and one that few people would ever engage in. Basically they are manipulating your emotions with their words are that blah, blah, blah. Narcissists can typically outsmart almost everybody because they used their well-placed lies and manipulation better than anybody – they should invest their times better and become actors/actresses and leave us alone. They are always ten steps ahead of you, so much so that it is uncanny. They are very QUICK with these unique approaches because they have used them their entire lives to con people, and “BAM” they have swept you off of your feet and keep you there. What else is there to do but bask in the glow of this unique relationship! You are undeniably intrigued by everything about them. When your relationship sours because the ugly truth rears itself with a Narcissist, you better duck for cover and be ready for a whole lot of damage control.
Their words are ALWAYS lies and a TRAP! A skillful Narcissist can tell anybody and everybody a great story just like reciting a well-known fairy tale because they are some of the greatest storytellers. They can weave fictional tales and lies into a complex story about themselves. They mesmerize you with amazing facts, statistics, trivia, history of events, to the point that you feel overwhelmed and just amazed at their acuity and accuracy. They are always the center of these stories, often re-writing their personal history, and lying to embellish the stories. One thing you can say is that they are hardly boring with their accounts of their amazing world and life.
They can incessantly talk and talk about most anything without skipping a beat with their interesting information. They are human chameleons that study human nature, but with a goal to further their power by enhancing their stature and influence the people around them to get what they crave – supply. Undoubtedly, they exaggerate their every claim and position in their life. They are addicted to this omnipotence and we are what they need to use as a mirror to see this amazing reflection of themselves. Unfortunately, what they do in the darkness without a care to the people that love them is also part of the equation and their ability to tell an amazing story to cover up their out-of-control lifestyle.
They lie to weasel their way in and out of any situation and come up smelling like a rose. They are pathological liars in every sense of the word and hide their hideous and perverted life. This is the sad reality of a human connection with them and keep that connection going and the reality turns personally disastrous and destructive as the truth becomes evident that they are not fully functioning human beings and they will take your life down with them.
Narcissists work extremely hard at making themselves believable as it concerns their overt lies and myths about themselves. They arm themselves with a vast array of learned information they have harvested through their observations of other humans. They acquire and then wear, personalize or enhance this information as if it is truly theirs. So what is the goal with all of this? To snag you into his/her Narcissistic lair to make you supply them with the things they need and can’t get because they are a dark and manipulative personality that envies life, love and people.
Unfortunately for those that fall prey to a relationship with them, they exploit one of the greatest emotions to manipulate you into a special place right alongside them and that is love and they LOVE you! Loving them is like hosting a convention for bank robbers AT a bank with the vault right in sight. That vault will be emptied out and those robbers will point to the next person saying ‘they did it, not me” and then they will conveniently disappear with the goods.
It is ABSOLUTELY amazing how a Narcissist can cover their tracks to hide what can only be described as their perverse and out-of-control lifestyle and world. Remember they are not doing this just to be the amazing actors that they are. These are deceptive and abusive personalities that need this disguise to extort people and life using whatever instrument of abuse they can to achieve their agenda – the best word here is that they are cunning like a fox.
Let’s examine this “fake” aspect a little bit more. Narcissists exaggerate their accomplishments even where they work and they are bullies there as well as ANY place they are at They will even do volunteer work at charities, church organizations, or anywhere there are people that they can harvest supply from and MAINTAIN a ‘holier than YTHOU’ appearance and attitude. Narcissists are not only defined through their ‘love’ relationships they are everywhere, and their destruction is everywhere too.
It is still operative abuse and they are very aware of what they do and will lie to protect themselves. Awareness is a big coefficient here and that shouts out the very truth they have the ability to understand that what they do is horrendous and wrong, BUT yet they will not change or admit to their disorder because is serves them.
They create many theatric roles to cover every possible range to get supply. My point here is that they can also be highly “respectable individuals” in any facet of life like a therapist, judge, law enforcement personnel, a doctor, preacher, or just about anything. They will most assuredly use their power and authority to create intimidation, distance, admiration, respect and even abuse. They might even be that bad boy or girl that has many tattoos, piercings, chains, motorcycles, fancy cars, brash and loud, etc. Then again they can also be the lovable and huggable ‘big ole teddy bear’ type of person full of hugs and kisses. They are just everywhere because their ‘false mask and persona’ is what we see first and not the personality disorder.
A Narcissist is a person with some pretty amazing abilities that they utilize to cover their true identity. In my opinion, they can be formidable and of course CHARMING but dangerous to people! They can be impressive in power, strength, intelligence, humorous, caring, and even display empathy – but it is all fake and a ploy to achieve supply and they are abusers. If you get into ANY opposition with a Narcissist, they will become an astounding enemy that will take you down. They are not omnipotent in the least bit, but they might think so. They have MANY limitations especially as it concerns their ego that they defend, and it becomes their undoing.
Removing them and their ‘BLAH, Blah, BLAH,’ completely from your life is the only way to start on your road to recovery. No/minimal contact. Greg