Why Doesn’t a Narcissist Just Use Prostitutes for Supply
First of all, let me say that prostitutes are people too. What we’re talking about here, is there are people who engage in the profession of being someone’s supply for a price; those people are called prostitutes.
Beyond the obvious, let’s theorize about this for a moment.
Since the narcissist is in relationships to get, take and use people – doesn’t it seem that prostitutes are an attractive group of people for the narcissist? They’ve openly stepped up to the plate and said, “I can offer you ___________ ” for such and such a price – and both walk away from the non emotional arrangement satisfied?
Therein lies the rub. Narcissists don’t want ANYONE walking away from the situation satisfied. It’s not in them to care what the other person gets from their interaction. Not only that, they’ll convince themselves that they’re above having to pay for it or that a person who would charge for it is beneath them, not worthy of their time OR money.
Ill take it a step further and outright declare that the narcissists I’ve known are so Machiavellian, that they perversely enjoy the duping and manipulation because it further substantiates their false self image as being that of a “good con” “above the law” and “smart enough to get away with pulling the wool over others’ eyes”. There’s no empathy nor conscience about who a narcissist uses or hurts. Therefore, they get more “evil cred” by choosing a nice person, charming the pants off them (literally) and manipulating them into sticking around in a one-sided, toxic takership.
I witnessed first hand the dupers delight in the narcissist’s eyes. He outright committed acts of duping and harming people (his children included) where he’d get an evil laugh, his eyes got beedy and dark with evil excitement and he laughed at people openly for being such “chumps”.
Narcissists can’t honestly wheel and deal with people about what they hope to get out of the ‘relationship’, because they KNOW that anyone in their right mind, would look at them and tell them to GET LOST.
Who is unhealthy enough that they would agree with a narcissist’s one sided idea of healthy?
“So you’re telling me Im not going to get anything back from you, but you want me to stick in here, give you all I have, and never leave you?” “Ok! That sounds like a deal!!”
That requires too much honesty; that a narcissist would never possess. In their eyes, those who would go along with that kind of plan (like a prostitute for money) would not be “good enough” to validate their flagelling self esteem.
They much more enjoy the duping, the tricking, the almost getting caught, the highs, the lows, the drama and the tears of unrequited love on the part of the nice person they’ve conned.
There are great stakes for the narcissists sense of power and entitlement for them to mastermind a plot against a good person. They know inside that they are dark, evil, and very different from a good person. They know their own manipulations and tricks. When they “take on” a good person, they’re the evil that’s taking down “good”. Those qualities that make good people who they are: trusting, kind, unconditionally loving, etc. are the qualities that 1) Narcissists KNOW they don’t possess but envy and 2) make the narcissist believe that we were wiling saps or chumps.
They view our goodness as a weakness and their manipulation and perversion of our goodness as their STRENGTH.
Bottom line? They get a huge electrical charge out of taking down good people.
Damned if you do, damned if you don’t though, because what goes up in the beginning – “our valuing”, where the narcissist places us on a pedestal of the “best” “most” “brightest” “greatest”, will soon fall down as the narcissist realizes that nothing can shield them from abandonment. Even tricking their partner into staying with them. They begin to devalue us, claiming that we aren’t as great as they first hoped we were. This is a combination of their rage on the other side of their envy, their frustration that someone yet again isn’t able to fulfill all their longings and desires perfectly (the perfectly loving parent) and projection where they cast off their shame upon us, using us as a scapegoat to discharge their negative thoughts and feelings about themselves.
The narcissist subconsciously lives out the old Groucho Marx saying, “I wouldn’t want to be a member of any club that would have me”. And turns the blame towards us, finger pointing that there is something wrong with us for going along with all this abuse and manipulation in the first place. This thought is amplified by the fact we’ve likely left and returned many times to the abusive relationship with the narcissist.
Ultimately, a narcissist doesn’t need to use a prostitute. Someone or something they’d have to pay for requires far too much skin in the game for the narcissist. Trickery and manipulation gets them so much more “evil street cred” in the narcissist’s mind as well as the valuable time of someone who was duped into sacrificing themselves to make the narcissist happy; a failing gamble.
In the end, a good person will cost the narcissist, absolutely NOTHING.